It’s daybreak, the rooster’s crowing, and I’m still in bed. I probably should get up, but I reach for my laptop instead. I wonder if anyone’s bought my book overnight? I quickly check to see if there have been any new sales. My heart sinks when I find there have been none.
Perhaps someone’s left me a review. I look on both amazon.com and amazon.co.uk. Nope, nothing new there. By this stage I’m feeling a bit sorry for myself, when suddenly I remember Goodreads! I quickly login to check for reviews there. Alas, no, nothing new.
I haul myself out of bed, make a cup of tea, then sit down to work on my sequel. 50 words in, I think I should probably check what’s happening on Twitter. Ooh, 5 new followers overnight. Oh goodie. I spend some time interacting with the new followers. I read all the messages from people trying to sell me stuff, so it’s only polite that I reply and tell them about my book.
Twitter done, I catch up on what all my friends have been doing on Facebook. I put up a lame status about how awesome housesitting is by posting a photo of an idyllic setting from the balcony. Then I sit back and revel in the hundreds of likes, loves and gasps I get, not to mention the ‘I’m so jealous.’ comments. Yes! Success! I secretly high-five myself for having such an awesome life.
Right, back to work on my sequel. I’ll just check if I’ve had any sales in the last five minutes first. Nope, still nothing. Buy my book, Buy my book, will somebody just buy my flipping book, I scream at the lifeless graph. I double check my reviews. This time I also check the Australian site. Nobody in Australia has ever left me a review, despite knowing some books have been sold there!
Okay, back to my sequel. I sit down, open my laptop and start typing away. A warm fuzzy head nudges me. Oh shit, the dog. I forgot he needs a walk, we are housesitting after all.
We take the dog for a walk and are back half an hour later. I sit down, open my laptop, ready to get stuck into my sequel. But first I’ll just check if anyones bought my book in the last half hour. Of course they haven’t.
Let’s just check reviews again. I had five reviews last time I looked and now the number says six. My heart races with excitement as I check Amazon. Now was that five reviews on .com or .co.uk?
I know that one of them already had six reviews, but can’t remember which one. I double check and squeal with delight when I see that both sites now have six reviews.
By now, adrenaline is coursing through me as the question pops into my head. Is it a good review or a bad one?
I can’t click fast enough, desperate to read it, hoping it’s good. Drat, I can’t find it, maybe Amazon has deleted it. I scroll through all my old reviews, but it’s hard to differentiate one from the other. Oh yeah, the sort button. Sort by ‘Most Recent’. Ah, there it is, ooh and it’s five stars!
Before reading it, I run to find my partner and tell him all about it.
‘Mike, Mike, I have a new review. I’m soooo excited.’
‘That’s good,’ he replies, going about his business as usual.
‘Want me to read it to you?’
‘Sure,’ he says, and I wonder why he’s not as excited as me.
I read it out loud, then whoop for joy. I’m buzzing around like a little bee that’s had too much cola. I do a happy dance and break out in song. (This is real, I do actually do this, check out my youtube channel!)
We celebrate by having a cup of coffee and a game of cards. Then I go back to my computer and the cycle starts again.
If you’d like to add to my excitement, you can do so by reading my debut novel The Secret Community. If you enjoy it, please don’t forget to leave a review and I’ll arrange for Mike to record the happy dance for you 🙂